Missing The Boat Review: A Charming Hallmark Cruise Romance

Hallmark Channel’s latest romantic romp, Missing The Boat, whisks viewers onto a sun-soaked Mediterranean cruise that veers off course in the best way. It’s about two professionals whose work agendas crash together just as their hearts start to sync up.

The movie blends goofy mishaps, travel chaos, and dorky banter into a breezy, feel-good adventure. What starts as a flirty meet-cute at sea quickly spirals into a mad dash across Italy—runaway donkeys, transportation strikes, and even a so-called Medicanes all show up for the ride.

A Cruise Romance With a Comic Twist

At its core, Missing The Boat is classic Hallmark escapism. You get the beautiful backdrops, instant chemistry, and just enough obstacles to keep love dangling out of reach.

But this one’s got a screwball energy and a shameless love of puns that gives it a little extra zing.

The Meet-Cute That Sets Everything in Motion

Parker (Kristoffer Polaha) is a workaholic lawyer on a Mediterranean cruise for strictly business. His boss, Adam, owns the cruise line and is negotiating a major sale.

Parker’s job? Keep things running smoothly, impress the investors, and steer clear of distractions.

Kelly (Emilie Ullerup) enters as a secret shopper, quietly inspecting the ship for flaws for those very investors. Neither has any clue their professional lives are about to collide.

Their first meeting is a volley of jokes, pop culture references, and an easy, almost accidental charm. The chemistry? It’s immediate and somehow believable.

They don’t just flirt—they spar. Their foreplay is all wordplay, and honestly, it’s pretty delightful.

When Donkeys Derail Destiny

Of course, it wouldn’t be a Hallmark adventure without fate throwing in a curveball. Or, in this case, a donkey.

The Excursion That Goes Wrong

During a stop in Palermo, Parker and Kelly impulsively hop on a donkey ride up a mountain to see a hidden waterfall. Parker, ever the planner, frets they’ll miss the ship. Kelly, more of a “let’s just do it” type, nudges him along.

Then the donkeys bolt. Because, why not?

They scramble down the mountain, trek back to port, and—yep—watch the ship pull away without them. Suddenly, it’s a romantic chase across Italy.

The film keeps tossing obstacles in their path:

• A train workers’ strike that nearly strands them
• A looming Mediterranean hurricane (Medicanes, apparently that’s a thing)
• Professional misunderstandings that could tank Kelly’s career
• A ticking clock as the cruise sails on without them

Each mishap just gives Parker and Kelly more time together. Maybe that’s the real point, right?

The Power of Corny Chemistry

One of the film’s sneaky strengths is its full-on embrace of dad jokes and puns. In lesser hands, it’d be grating, but here it’s actually charming.

Wordplay as Romance

Parker’s sister Emily warns him not to be so corny, but Kelly’s right there with him. Their goofy humor becomes a sort of secret handshake.

Instead of relying on longing looks or big speeches, the movie builds romance through:

• Shared cultural references
• Playful teasing
• Inside jokes made under pressure

It just feels real. These are two people who genuinely like each other, even when stranded, stressed, or drenched by a Mediterranean storm.

A Supporting Cast That Steals Scenes

Parker and Kelly are the anchors, but the supporting cast brings unexpected laughs and color.

The Italian Twins You Will Not Forget

Orlando Seale is a highlight, playing twin Italian brothers—one a prickly port agent, the other an irritable car rental guy. Their over-the-top impatience and comedic timing make for some of the movie’s best moments.

These little side characters give the story room to breathe and keep it from feeling like a two-person show.

A Secondary Romance Brewing at Sea

Meanwhile, back on the cruise, Parker’s sister Emily and his boss Adam (Trey Warner) get their own subplot. Adam’s all business, almost to the point of parody, but there’s something weirdly endearing about it.

This side romance mirrors the main story, quietly nudging the idea that sometimes the best plans are the ones you never saw coming.

Travel Chaos Meets Hallmark Comfort

If you’re a fan of Hallmark’s European adventures, you’ll spot the familiar beats. The movie breezes from one pretty location to the next, echoing other travel romances in the channel’s lineup.

Why the Predictability Works

Sure, you’ll see the misunderstandings coming. The professional conflict will threaten to blow things up, but it’ll all work out in the end.

But honestly, that’s kind of the point.

The fun is in how these characters tackle their hurdles. The movie stands out thanks to:

• Sharp comedic writing
• Performances that just click
• An ensemble cast with real warmth

Is Missing The Boat Worth Boarding?

If you’re after escapist romance with a healthy dose of silliness, this film delivers. It doesn’t try to reinvent anything—it just leans into its strengths: charm, humor, and chemistry.

The Final Verdict

Stream it. The script is silly but smart. There are clever exchanges that lift what could’ve been a basic travel mishap into something a lot more fun.

Polaha and Ullerup anchor the story with performances that feel relaxed and natural. The ensemble casting adds a cozy, communal vibe that makes the cruise ship setting feel inviting.

If you’re in the mood for Mediterranean views, runaway donkeys, and a love story where the biggest sparks come from perfectly timed puns, this is one voyage you probably won’t regret taking.